Tell me a lie

Life revolves around eleven minutes, depends on eleven minutes, requires eleven minutes, loves for eleven minutes, lies for eleven minutes, fights for eleven minutes and cries for eleven minutes.


What are those eleven minutes?


What if we took the desire out of a situation. What if we had to pick partners based on their personalities and the colour of their souls? People would go wild. No one would find partners. We crave the chase, the game, the rejection, the pain. All these sufferings take part in helping us to rule out the men and women who aren't “the one”. Or at least that's what we tell ourselves. Yes I use the word suffering. We love to suffer, all we do is suffer and what's worse is that we enjoy our suffering. We need the pain to escape something, something that anchors us into the moment. We don't want to live in the moment. We like waiting for him or her to come home, but when his here we can't wait till he leaves to miss him again. To suffer missing him. You love the suffering you feel when his not there and not the soul standing in front of you.



I'd catch a grenade for you...but if you really loved me, you wouldn't actually allow me to.

I'd catch a grenade for you...

Life revolves around eleven minutes, depends on eleven minutes, requires eleven minutes, loves for eleven minutes, lies for eleven minutes, fights for eleven minutes and cries for eleven minutes.


What are those eleven minutes?


What if we took the desire out of a situation. What if we had to pick partners based on their personalities and the colour of their souls? People would go wild. No one would find partners. We crave the chase, the game, the rejection, the pain. All these sufferings take part in helping us to rule out the men and women who aren't “the one”. Or at least that's what we tell ourselves. Yes I use the word suffering. We love to suffer, all we do is suffer and what's worse is that we enjoy our suffering. We need the pain to escape something, something that anchors us into the moment. We don't want to live in the moment. We like waiting for him or her to come home, but when his here we can't wait till he leaves to miss him again. To suffer missing him. You love the suffering you feel when his not there and not the soul standing in front of you.



I'd catch a grenade for you...but if you really loved me, you wouldn't actually allow me to.

Not quite 11 minutes but good enough

It's better to love and lose then think you love and live a monotonous life. Someone once said: "your story with him is so sad, so tragic" and I smiled. She couldn't understand why I smile and no longer cry. Truth is every tear, every smile, every emotion I experience is a blessing. He blessed me with his time and love. I was lucky to have felt that close to someone and that kind of passion. Life is all about those eleven minutes. It's what produces life, leads some lives, what some lives revolve around, what other lives spend half their lives looking for, what some people sell to survive. With him...it would've been hours. That's a lifetime. A lifetime I've experienced over and over without experiencing the essential eleven. Your heart should be a wine glass. How full should it be before expressing the love? It should over flow. There should be no other way to describe how one feels. It should be so natural, like instincts, Luke there's nothing else on the planet that would make sense but intimacy. It should fall into place, and it will. Most people aren't lucky enough to experience that. Some marry and never experience it. Some experience it for one night. Does that make the gift any less special? Any less of a gift? Any less of a blessing?

We as humans can't accept that everything has a shelf life. Nothing is eternal. Maybe you have that type of love, but believe me he wasn't born with it.

Blood sucking and hard f…you know what I mean

“Sweetheart you are not Anastasia Steele. Becoming his bitch will not make him love you. 50 Shades of Grey is an adult version of twilight. If you think his your Christian Grey you may as well believe he drinks blood and sparkles.” – A.A

It makes me nervous. I’ve read all four twilight books as well as all three of the 50 Shades of Grey. I’m 21. Some may believe I’m too young to read 50 Shades, and there’s a part of me that agrees. Girls that are 16 are reading it and using it as a guide to find love. There’s a living breathing example on my facebook friends list. A young girl, recently turned 18, made a deal to sleep with a 38 year old divorced, Christian man with four kids. She fell in love and is now a young Muslim girl in love with a much older ugly man because she read 50 shades and she believes that this man will be her Grey. He’s her fucked up fifty that she wants to save and she’s his little slutty Ana. She literally calls him ‘Sir’!!! Not only did she ruin a perfectly good fictional story for me; she also made me spit coffee all over my friends face with her facebook status'.

Christian Grey is a man with a complex character, deep seeded issues that are realistic, but the way he deals with them, and her is unrealistic. A man like that isn’t always lucky enough to turn out relatively normal, which is what he is. Real life is harsh. A man THAT possessive, needy, over protective, and controlling as Edward Cullen or Christian Grey is usually abusive (they might not even realize it). 

After I read twilight and 50 I didn’t go around looking for a shiny hungry man or S and M. Why is it that girls do?

I believe that if you look for either of them, you aren't emotionally intelligent enough to be reading those books. Only emotionally sane and rational people know that all those qualities don't exist without serious consequences. Whats worse is that young adults think its okay to advertise the fact that they like and are looking for sex from older domineering men. Even THEY get boyfriends! Oh well...on the bright side at least they're getting laid.